Storm
In the stillness of the spirit speak Your word and let me hear it.
Let me listen quietly, closely,
let me know it deeply, slowly.
Let my stormy troubled thoughts
be stilled by Your word spoken clearly,
in my heart and in my life
let Your peace calm every strife.
Make my life a smooth reflection of Your love and Your perfection.
Though troubles come and always will, speak to me Your “peace, be still".
-HJ

Lord, you have set us free
and here we sit inside the gate
still stupidly dwelling in captivity
though the very breeze of freedom
drifts in and tantalizes our nostrils

we hold onto that which we will not let go
and cannot grasp that which will never let us go

Dispossession Date
On the morning of the big day
we waken early and cannot sleep
having prepared for the big move
the night before
we set off into the new day
loaded down with all that we can take with us
memories of the dear old place we are leaving
precious possessions and lists of lifelong friends
skills we have gathered
good deeds and failures packed in cardboard boxes
we set off to the new house
the journey takes a span of hours
spent in
anticipation and apprehension
of the unknown that is soon to be upon us
fear and excitement
of the approaching unfamiliar as we shed the old
we finally draw near to the new dwelling place
we hold our breath and the doorknob
at the entrance
and simply step through
-HJ

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. -Romans 12:12

The joy is missing. It may return,
but don`t look for it, just watch and yearn.
And patience has been worn so thin
it cannot hold even one sigh in.
All that`s left for me to do
is to remain faithful in prayer to You.
So here it is. Now it`s been said,
You`ll do your work; I`ll go to bed.
-HJ

Matthew 27:46

If the very Son of God cried out in anguish and in pain
a heaving sob of "Why?!" sent flying out to heaven's domain,
how much more is it acceptable to be creatures so in need
of a rescue or a saving as we weep, we faint, we bleed.
Maybe not a sign of weakness, but an accepting recognition
by the One who came from better, of our sad human condition.
But think to Whom He wept it!, as He lived the tortured cross,
sent homage tears to the One who vows to fully redeem each loss.
Faith is knowing there's an answer for every heartfelt 'why',
we'll be more than compensated for each hope that we've watched die,
and knowing that we have a God who truly understands,
and that living without questions is not one of His demands.
-HJ Aug 23, 2010

I believe in the perfection of heaven,
and that our joy shall be complete,
and that someday when we look back on life
all will be revealed.
We'll know why we needed suffering,
how pain is justified or explained,
and the reason for all the sadness on earth,
what our losses eventually gained.
But meanwhile, back here in this life,
in this world where I presently stand,
I must ask for wisdom or forgiveness:
there's so much I do not understand.
We have seen how the innocent suffer,
and how some live whole lifetimes in pain.
We have wept as a loved one lies dying,
knowing we'll never see them again.
So forgive me my sorry confusion,
and forgive please my anger and doubt.
If I cannot yet have understanding
lend forgiveness until all is found out.
-HJ Aug 19, 2010

I'm weary from weeping, but the king awaits.
Unworthy but called, I enter his gates
to offer my service, poor as it may be,
for I love the king deeply, though much more he loves me.
This king needs no counsel; his own word is wise
and willingly given as the need will arise.
And I do not serve him to gain a reward
(although it is promised). There is no other lord
so worthy of allegiance, so true to his word.
At sight of my suffering his compassion is stirred
and his sword lifted up, evil brought to its knees,
for all who would harm me are the king's enemies.
He has fought the same battle that I must face,
a good king who knows all the struggles of this race.
The throng of his followers, faithful, loyal and bold,
is mighty in number, wondrous to behold.
And all have faced hardship and harsh lonely fates;
though weary, they come, for the king awaits.
-HJ Aug.12, 2010

Doubting Sonnet

How much of you is my imagination;
how much of you is what you have revealed
in mercy to a lost and wandering nation
with lying tongues, with hearts against you steeled?
I worship you as God of all the ages,
almighty, and all-knowing, and always.
I know, in fairness, my wrongs have earned wages,
a deathly debt which only blood repays.
But can it be you love us as they told us?
And is forgiveness offered free and clear?
With sorrow for our suffering you behold us?
And is each single one your child most dear?
To turn from you were lifelong lonely grief.
I do believe; help you my unbelief.
-HJ Aug. 7, 2010

The book the book I was in so deep
that when I came out it was hard to breathe
and the sky looked odd and the breeze on my skin
was foreign, and I just wanted back in
side the more real world of wisdom and words
and rhythm and rhyme and me, immersed.
-HJ July 18, 2010

I cannot sing to his holiness
but I can sing to his mercy.
I cannot stand, for lowliness.
Before him I am uncleanliness,
which should condemn and curse me.
It was love that sought and found me.
It was grace put its arms around me.
I cannot sing to his holiness
but I can sing to his mercy.
Forgiveness received, how withhold it?
Those needing to hear must be told it:
God yearns for you immensely,
the chooser waits to be chosen,
come alive with the one arisen.
I cannot sing to his holiness
but I can sing to his mercy.
-HJ July 12, 2010